TSA: Are You Social?
Aug 31 2009

One Hell Of A Party

Ash graduated!!! and we had a pig roast – it was one hellofa party.  Im in love. Im happy.  Im content.  Im a partner in this life with someone who is in it with both feet, and she understands me… well, she understands that I am me.

We roasted a pig this weekend, had about 100 people over both days and neither of us got hammered and spent the night on the bathroom floor.  This brings two main thoughts to mind.

1. OH MY GOD, IM GROWN UP!

2. OH MY GOD, IM GROWN UP!

Actually, I cant remember the last time I spent the night on the kitchen floor.

I had a great effin time this weekend, thanks to everyone who made it out!  And congrats on your achievement baby, I’m proud of you!


Aug 31 2009

Life’s A Bitch – Its All In The Contrast

Life’s a bitch… she used to say when she was not herself.  We all have skeletons in our closets and I tend to keep mine locked up.

I have so many wonderful things going on right now yet one of the most difficult things I’ve ever dealt with has come up again.  “Its all in the contrast” I keep saying to myself. Its the contrast that helps us see how good the good things really are, when we have something so terrible to compare it with.

Strangely enough I am finding myself at a place I never thought I would be, letting go of the root of this issue in so much as realizing I cant fix anything outside of myself and my own actions.

I love you so very much.  And you are completely right, we aren’t on the same page anymore.  If you aren’t going to do whats necessary to care for yourself there is little rational in me being all fucked up about it.

I hope you find your “right mind”.


Aug 17 2009

Projects Consume Me.

Deeply involved.  Too many things going on.  Busier than necessary.  That’s my life right now and it will absolutely pay off.

“The word “project” thus actually originally meant “something that comes before anything else happens”.

That is what I am so buried under right now… I wish everyone could be ok with that.  I have a well laid out plan, in 3 months I will unveil what I have been up to in individual pieces.


Aug 17 2009

beginning to get irritated wit mbl

Undergoing MyBlogLog Verification


Aug 16 2009

How I Get Everything I want

For years I studied the science, theories, philosiphies, ideas of “how to get what you want”.  I read books, watched movies, talked with gurus and learned how it works for me, how to manifest things and experiences at will.

It stated in my teens when I found I really did enjoy reading, my mother was a practitioner at Mile High, church of religious science which is different than Scientology, The Institute Of Mind Sciences, TIMS, School Of Applied Metaphysics etc. you can find a whole list of New Thought Denominations.

I have also dabbled in paganism, Wicca, and majick in general along with self help and personal development, personal awareness, meditation and theology.

The underlying process of life, I guess you could call it, has been one of a few things that has held my attention through the years.

Here is an outline of what I have come to use in creating or manifesting.  I do believe that this process is a personal one and what works for me may not work for you.

  • Feeling
  • Thought
  • Idea
  • more feeling
  • decision
  • put “it” in words
  • put “it” in pictures
  • create “it” as a movie in my head
  • acceptance
  • release

Here is how I progress through the process:

I could use anything as an example but its easier to see how the above is applied to a physical object.

First I have a feeling, one I like or one I don’t, lets say I want a new car because mine is beginning to show signs of age.

The feeling may be, “it would be nice to have a car that everything works and doesn’t need to go to the mechanics every other month!”

Then the thought

“That new jeep is AWESOME! I want one”

The idea

“If I do this… If I can do that… then I can get that new jeep”

More feeling (emotion)

“I would feel so much better knowing that I am driving a newer car because it wouldnt have things go wrong with it at random”

“It would be so cool to have a car that was That color, I really like that copper metallic color on the new jeeps”

“If I had that jeep I could pull my trailer up the mountain so much easier”

etc

The decision

I am going to get that new jeep

I start putting it in words

by talking about it with friends, with my significant other

I start talking to people that own them

etc

Put it in pictures

Maybe I start looking them up on the internet

go to the dealership to get a brochure

Create movies in my head about it (daydreaming)

I see myself driving it, washing it, taking it camping etc and play these movies in my head over and over

I accept it as true, meaning I am acting like I have it now

this is the place where most have problems in their manifesting, it can be a hard task tricking your own brain into thinking you have something you “really” don’t yet… this is easier to get past and I will cover that in my next post.

One of the ways I do this is by “monitoring” my internal language by consciously removing the words and statements that indicate future tense like “when” “if” etc… “when I have it” and “if I get it with a hard top”.  This is just one of the things I do but I think its the most important because words are thoughts and they are what we use to communicate with ourselves.  If you can gradually change your internal language to yourself it will change your vibration that corresponds to the “thing” you want.

Release it

at this point I know I am going to have it, period, that’s all there is to it so I let it go, forget about it and move on to other things.  This, for me, backs up my belief in “how the universe works, in my opinion”.


Aug 15 2009

Writing A Love Note…

Ash,

As much as we show it, say it, talk about it and experience it I wanted to write you a love note so you could read it.

Nothing in this world is perfect, yet our relationship couldn’t possibly be any better. You are my best friend, my confidant, my lover and my partner.

flower

Photo: Muffet

The thrill of being with you never fades, and the longing to see you when we have been apart is as intense as it was the first weeks we were together.

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